Sex On The First Date?
So it’s 2017 and everyone claims to be liberated and free, right? Women are dressing in less clothing without any shame, men have become more open about their sexuality and the concepts of “relationships” and “dating” have changed drastically. With all this liberation there is still one taboo that people still tip toe around: Is sex on the first date okay?
This question mostly pertains to the ladies because honestly who judges a man for this kind of stuff…….. I’ll wait!
There is no right or wrong answer to this question, especially if you’re the type of person who is nonchalant to societal rules. There are all types of blogs convincing women that a little promiscuity is okay and encouraging them to embrace their sexuality more. Not to mention nobody really likes the first date because there’s so much anxiety and pressure, and that one question is stable in the back of both of your minds the whole time: Are we going to have sex later? According to Laura Argintar, first date sex has become a topic of controversy, with many of us still believing in the shameful stigma attached to it. She also mentions we’re still viewing sex on the first date as a make-or-break moment.
Women are definitely taking more charge in the world, so who cares if they have sex on the first date?
Sex on the first date isn’t always bad, but here is a reason why it might not put you in the position you want to be in…
According to social psychology, humans go through a mental process called Justification of Effort. This is the tendency for individuals to increase their liking for something they have worked hard to attain. This mental process is the reason why we join frats/sororities, the army, etc. The harder we work for something, the more we convince ourselves we like it and it was worth the work. Now, imagine you go out with a guy you really like and you want him to like you back. If he expends little to no effort to get you into bed, He won’t even think twice if he likes you because he put no effort into getting something he wanted from you.
This is not to discourage ladies from having sex or being free spirited with their sex life, and fellas I’m not trying to step on your toes. This is just insight on decision making and to help women understand what they require from someone before performing actions they can’t take back.